I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
