next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Randomize
