I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
