ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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