So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
