...so i touched it.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
