C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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