I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
My vagina just recognized that song.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
