it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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