I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
