Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
hell yes lets make some ravioli
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
