ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
