Dual....:-)
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
