:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
one might say we're banned from that church
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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