Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
