Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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