He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Randomize
