please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
this will be a night to untag.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
