When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
