So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
