Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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