Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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