East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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