i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
