why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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