i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize