its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
