She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
