Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
