If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
