Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
