: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
