Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
