well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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