i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
