He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
