That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
