ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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