remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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