hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
