Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm getting married
To pizza
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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