You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
