You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
