found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
