i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Cover your peen. We're going out.
wow bdsm is so cute
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
