come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Randomize
