By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
