Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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