I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize