I must be too annoying 4 u.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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